What the Ham!
by Nimmi
Summary: A Hamtaro/Quake crossover. What happens when Hamtaro gets a hold of the Lightning gun...


A.N: Please review!! PLEASE!! PLEASE!! PLEASE!!!  
  
  
  
"Badda badda badda!!" thought Hamtaro as he was on the road to the clubhouse. "Must get to the-"  
  
Hamtaro stopped when he saw a strange object on the ground "What's this?" he thought.  
  
The object was big and metal, it was sparking too!  
  
"I know!" exclaimed Hamtaro "It's a flashlight!!"  
  
Hamtaro started to dance up and down "My very own flashlight! OOPA!!"  
  
Then, with great difficulty, Hamtaro dragged the "flashlight" into Boss' tunnel.  
  
  
  
"Where's Hamtaro?" asked Boss at the Ham-ham clubhouse "He should have been here by now!"  
  
"He could have gotten lost" suggested Maxwell.  
  
Meanwhile, Oxnard was chasing Stan all about the clubhouse.  
  
"Give me back my sunflower seed!" wailed Oxnard as he ran.  
  
"C'mon Oxy!" cheered Stan happily "You'll never catch me THAT way!"  
  
Oxnard sniffed a little, then began to run faster, he tripped onto a pair of roller blades that Panda was making and was speeding towards Stan at full force.  
  
"AIIIIIEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!" cried Stan as he tried to run faster, but he wasn't fast enough and Oxnard slammed into him. The two hamsters rolled into a fuse box and all the lights went out.  
  
"WHAT THE HAM!!!!" cried Boss "Now look what you've done!!!"  
  
  
  
Hamtaro was meanwhile walking through the tunnel, still dragging the flashlight, when suddenly, the lights went out.  
  
"What the Ham!" cried Hamtaro as he looked around the tunnel franticly "I can't see a thing!!"  
  
It was then, that he got an idea.  
  
"I know!" he exclaimed "I have a flashlight, I can use it"  
  
Hamtaro pushed a button on the back, a brilliant flash of light surrounded the tunnel  
  
"Whoa!" exclaimed Hamtaro "This is a Tootru Greatchu flashlight!"  
  
Suddenly, a cloud of smoke appeared and surrounded Hamtaro  
  
"Cough cough!" breathed Hamtaro as the smoke cleared "HEY!!" he cried "What happened to the wall? It was here just a second ago! I can see out!"  
  
Hamtaro climbed out of the hole "Boss is gonna KILL me! I wonder where I am though..."  
  
Hamtaro turned on the flashlight, there was again a flash of bright light, and again there was smoke.  
  
The hamster watched as the smoke cleared "This flashlight could use fixing..."  
  
Suddenly, Hamtaro saw something "Gasp-P!" cried Hamtaro "Wasn't there a forest there? Where did it go?"  
  
  
  
Meanwhile, on a path not far from where Hamtaro found the flashlight.  
  
"AIIIEEEEEEEE!!!!" yelled Quake Kid Jr (Quake Kid Jr is the son of Quake Kid (Read my Single Player Pea-shooters fic) as he ran "Back Chamberler BACK!!!"  
  
The Chamberler roared as he chased Quake Kid Jr across the path.  
  
"Heehee!" grinned Quake Kid jr "Just you wait, you may have the upper hand now, but just wait till I find my-"  
  
Quake Kid Jr skidded to a halt in the middle of the path "But it was right here a few minutes ago!"  
  
The Chamberler raised his arms above his head and sent lightning crashing down on Quake Kid Jr.  
  
"ARG!!" he cried as a trickle of blood went down his lip "Just wait till I get Daddy!!"  
  
He then noticed that is butt was on fire "YEEEEEOOOOOWWWWW!!!! HOT! HOT!! HOT!!!"  
  
Quake Kid Jr ran up the path followed by the Chamberler.  
  
  
  
Hamtaro finally made it to the clubhouse "Maxwell!" he cried "I want you to take a look at this flashlight! It's Tootru Bizzaroo!"  
  
Maxwell looked at it carefully "This is no flashlight Hamtaro!" explained Maxwell "It appears to be some sort of Lightning gun!"  
  
"Well THAT explains a lot..." muttered Hamtaro  
  
  
  
"How could you LOSE the Lightning gun!!" cried Quake as he and his son, Quake Kid Jr walked up the path.  
  
"Well I would have been able to defeat the Chamberler if I had some more guns..."  
  
"I TOLD you!, you aren't old enough for a Grenade Launcher! And you STOLE the Lightning gun!"  
  
"Can't I at LEAST have the keys to the BFG 9000!"  
  
"NO!"  
  
"AWWW!! But Doom Kid Jr's father lets him play with it!"  
  
"If Doom Kid Jr jumped off a bridge, would you?"  
  
"But you only lose 10% health!" whined Quake Kid Jr  
  
  
  
The End  
  
A.N: PLEASE REVIEW!!!! 


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